Entry 18: Full Steam Ahead

I am sitting on my mom’s porch and see my daughter inside on the couch. I am thinking about how I “graduated” on Monday. I say that with quotes because of the societal offensive stigma that graduating a “community college” isn’t really an accomplishment. But of course it was! Tarrant County is the grassroots of what I will become.

Being able to actually walk in the commencement ceremony even proved to be a challenge.

And what kind of crap is that?

I have been raising a kid (an exceptional one at that, that girl in there is a leader), maintaining a 3.8 GPA, paying for this bill, paying for that, and driving an endless amount of miles for two years. Hell, I even saved a kids LIFE this year. 😳😳😳 So, I ask myself has it really been that long?

I’ve done some amazing things with my life and time is flying by. Two more years, that’s it?

Sooner than later you are going to get what you want. All of this “waiting” you’re experiencing now is a means to an end. Whoever is blessed or lucky, or however you wanna say it, to be in your life, they are going to be more than honored to be affiliated with a woman like you. They are going to be more than happy because you are going places.

My life has no limits. What is a regular life?

There are places and things, and so many other nouns that are changing for you. Do not let any type of meddlesome dilemmas stop you, slow you, or drag you down. Do not let anything steer your gaze away from what you’re truly looking for. Be wary.

I cannot tell you to not take some risks, to be vulnerable, love, and lust. I tell you make yourself beautiful and passionate. But do not fall for the little traps in life that can easily blend in with the right choices. Keep your guard up.

I read some of my past thoughts and think, look at all of this, you’re tripping! Who cares?

Who cares about this stupid boy you’ve fallen for? Invest your time into a more rewarding subject.

Who cares about the shitty car situation? Pay that shit off in half the time they gave you.

All that shit, is a means to an end.

Because you’ve gone through so many things, yet pull through life full steam ahead. At this rate, you can do anything, love anyone, be anywhere. You can love somebody else more extraordinarily. More extraordinary than this. 👇🏽👇🏽

Believe me. You want to be blown away? Oh it can happen. You don’t have to prod someone into realizing it. You don’t have to state the obvious. One day, it could be such a love story it prods into you!

Girl… Believe me. There is nothing like adventure and you’re destined for it . You are a wonderfully talented, spontaneous, exotic and mysterious woman that will dare to stand against the grain. There’s not a lot of women that push back, and you push harder than most.

Ask yourself, what is a regular life?

Because you are not living one.

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